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London

Food

The Cinnamon Club

November 11, 2015

The Cinnamon Club was massively disappointing. Highlights included paying £30/person for Butter Chicken, made with anorexic chicken legs and completely forgetting to bring out one of our mains. But lets start at the beginning…

My husband had chosen to go there to celebrate his birthday and I was looking forward to it. I’m not actually a huge fan of Indian food, but he introduced me to our local Noor Jahan, which has amazing butter chicken, so when he wanted to go to The Cinnamon Club, I was excited.

I arrived, told the reception it was my husband’s birthday and sat in the bar area which was overly lit with florescent lights. I was told I was the first in our party to arrive and after I ordered my Cosmo (there are no vodka based cocktails on their menu) I waited ages. Turns out my mother in law had in fact arrived before me and was waiting at the table. She eventually found me along with my husband and my drink still hadn’t arrived.

We moved into the dining room which has better lighting and looks like a library. We brought our drinks (which by then had thankfully shown up, and were very good) to the table and I discreetly told the waitress it was my husband’s birthday and we would like some kind of cake with candles at the end.

(Sorry for the mid bite pic! I was so hungry!)

Our starters came out quickly. I had the crisp spinach, which was like spinach tempura and potato chips. It wasn’t the best choice. My husband had the lamb escalope which was the best out of everything we ordered and my MIL had the lobster which was also fairly tasty.

Then came the disaster of a main course. I was really looking forward to this expensive butter chicken. There was gold leaf on the potato balls, and I think that’s where the cost came from, because they certainly didn’t splurge for actual chicken, just the leftover spindly legs. There was no meat on them. So I filled up on rice and naan. I had also ordered the roast cauliflower. That never showed up and we were so disappointed with the chicken, we decided not to bother asking for it.

The banana tarte I had for dessert was okay. What wasn’t okay was when my MIL went to the bathroom and the waitress came out and asked us when we would like the cake and candle for her birthday… in front of my husband. Face palm. I told her of the faux pas and she brought it out anyway for him, quite anticlimactically.

Bit sad, isn’t it? Dessert isn’t supposed to be sad.

If you want to risk it (and bring a wad of cash):

The Cinnamon Club

The Old Westminster Library

30-32 Great Smith Street

London

SW1P 3BU

www.cinnamonclub.com

Food

Roka Canary Wharf

November 4, 2015

Stephanie

2 Comments

First off, I’d like to apologize once again to the woman at Roka Canary Wharf sitting two tables down from me for hitting her in the head with my chopstick. I have no idea how said chopstick went from being in my hand to in your hair, but it happened. Thank you to the gentlemen at the table next to me for attempting to take the blame, when we all know it was me who clearly can’t behave in a fancy restaurant. Also, thank you to physics, the real reason hilarious stuff happens.

Anyway, onto the review. I’d been to Roka’s Charlotte Street location several years ago and remember being freezing cold the whole time. My experience in Roka Canary Wharf was much better than that. Our waitress Martyna was very very good. Our cocktails took a bit longer than expected and you could tell she was angrier about it than we were. When they did arrive, they were delicious! Rome wasn’t built in a day and my cocktail took 20 minutes. Both were worth the wait. I had the raspberry passion and it tasted like raspberry juice that gets you drunk. Like I said, worth it.

We had the premium tasting menu and the wine pairings to go with it. I couldn’t pronounce 90% of the menu, but it was all delicious. The best dish on the menu was the first thing we had, the yellowtail sashimi because it had a truffle dressing. The premium sashimi selection was good, but I did find the tuna to be a little fishy.

As usual, I really liked the spicy tuna roll, which is my favorite kind of sushi. I hate when restaurants cover perfectly good sushi with cayenne pepper and just call it spicy. Roka’s spicy tuna didn’t do that and was very mild but oddly (in a good way) geometric.

By the time we got to the black cod and scallop skewers, I was pretty full. The scallops were good, but I think Hakkasan has a better black cod.

The desert boat was huge! My favorites were the orange sorbet and the chocolate green tea fondant although, full disclosure, I just ate the outside chocolate cake part.

Overall, the meal was delicious, but obviously quite pricy. But that’s not really a surprise in Roka. Insider tip: getting there or home on a weeknight can be a nightmare. I was coming from west London and it wasn’t too bad, but there were massive queues to get into Canary Wharf tube station. This time it was because of the DLR strike, but apparently it’s usually quite bad. Things calmed down around nine. So prepare to stay for the long haul.

Roka

Canary Wharf

+44 (0) 20 7636 5228

http://www.rokarestaurant.com

(Warning: their website has a loud and annoying video that plays on the landing page)

Food

Lucio

October 27, 2015

Stephanie

Lucio is a Chelsea favourite among locals and celebrities. We’ve been there a few times, but this time I took pictures! The specials are always delicious and the staff extremely friendly.

One of the highlights for me are the photos that decorate the walls. Lucio is friends with Terry O’Neill and has his iconic photos all over the restaurant. Makes me feel glamorous and think of myself in that era, indulging on pasta in a bid to gain weight for bigger boobs. Ahh, those were the days.

This time around I had the pumpkin soup with ham. It was really delicious, with a hint of bacon flavor. Refreshingly for my waistline, it also didn’t have any cream.

For my main, I had the fillet steak, which was cooked to perfection. The red onions had some tang to them, which went great with the potatoes.

Now that we got the food bit over with, time to get to the real reason I wanted to go there and write a blog. They probably have the best chocolate fondant in London. I know that’s a huge statement to make, but I’ve had a lot. Like, if it’s on the menu at any restaurant, I’ll order it. And as a testament to how amazing it is at Lucio’s, my husband and I have gone here just for dessert. Like I mentioned before, the staff ate awesome. The owner and his son chat to us all the time and they made a special exception one night when I NEEDED to have some chocolate.

It’s not a cheap evening out though, so if you are looking for just straight up cheap and cheerful Italian, Riccardo’s is across the street and slightly less.

What to wear: The dress varies from cocktail to jeans. Lucio has an impressive collection of American rodeo belt buckles. Make sure you ask him about them!

Who you’ll see: Apparently celebrities frequent Lucios often. I’ve never seen one or didn’t recognize them. Fun fact: Lucio’s has a second exit, which has been used before when a man took his mistress there for dinner and his wife walked in.

Lucios

257-259 Fulham Road, London, SW7 6HY

0207 823 3007

www.luciorestaurant.com

Food

Dirty Bones

October 19, 2015

Stephanie

Dirty Bones is f&*king glorious. Let me add a small caveat to that statement: I was (conservative estimate) 8 drinks in by the time I got there.

I hope when I die my heaven is dirty bones except that I don’t get morbidly obese from eating it every day for every meal. But if I’m honest I hope heaven is also me giving like, -7 f&*ks about what I look like.

We were there for a private party in the back and my (genius) friend decided to have it 90s themed. My husband beat me to the ordering but started strong with chicken wings and the Dirty Dog. I don’t like to eat meat off bones because it makes me feel like a cave man, but considering how fast they went, I’m sure the wings were delicious. The hot dog… well, it’s going into my top 5. There were crispy shallots and two different kinds of pork. TWO. Crispy bacon, which is the only way to have it, and pulled pork.

We were still hungry so I went big and ordered the Yankee Dog, the Mac Daddy and the Dirty Fries, because you know what? I don’t go half way down a rabbit hole.

The Mac Daddy has mac and cheese on it (enough said) and I almost bit my husband’s finger off for the last bite of the Yankee Dog. Like I said before, this place is f&*king glorious. I gained at least 12 lbs eating here but cool with it because IT WAS DECLICIOUS.

I also had more drinks. This is an actual conversation with the bartender:

Me: 70% of me wants to order an interesting cocktail from you but the other 30% of me is a skinny bitch and wants a vodka soda.

Bartender: I like the 30% of you.

Bringing me food in the state I was in was like feeding a pack of hungry dogs. The staff were really nice and super accommodating. As soon as I lose the weight I put on, I’m going back to start this vicious cycle again.

Dirty Bones (Kensington)

20 Kensington Church Street, London, W8 4EP

www.dirty-bones.com

Food

The Orange

October 16, 2015

Stephanie

It was a Thursday night so my friend Michelle and I decided to go scuba diving in white wine. We started at The Orange, a gastro pub and hotel on Pimlico road. I’d been there before this summer but didn’t eat. I did, however, almost get my phone stolen by dodgy guys who came into the pub and tried to sell us birthday cards. After failing to blag our way into the dining room, we sat in the pub area at a small round table with great food lighting and ordered our dinner. Upon initial perusal of their new menu, my initial reaction was that this food was a bit stuffy for a pub. The special was a burger, which in my opinion should be a staple.

I ordered the calamari to start and was super relieved to see that it came with just the rings. I don’t like to associate calamari with what it actually is. To me, it’s essentially round French fries with protein. It was very very crispy, actually I’d say it was crunchy and the rings weren’t rubbery. Overall, pretty good.

My friend had the pumpkin soup, which she said was delicious and looked fantastic.

For our main, we moved to another table because we had some friends joining. By this time we were almost a bottle deep in the wine (which they didn’t open at the table… ew). I ordered the burger with sweet potato fries because they both had bacon on them. The burger was mediocre. It was cooked well, but a bit dry and the brioche bun fell apart easily. The bacon was just barely cooked and too chewy for my taste. On the upside, there was a nice spicy tomato relish on the burger.

The sweet potato fries were excellent, but it took the waiter a really long time to bring the bacon aioli they came with. Unfortunately, this meant the sweet potato fries started to get soggy by the time it arrived.

Our friends joined and ate most of my fries and wanted to order another. It was 9:59 and apparently one kitchen had closed. She could, however, get an entire pizza. That just didn’t make sense to me. She ordered the pizza anyway and they seemed to enjoy it.

Verdict: Overall the orange was a good way to begin our night but I wouldn’t go out of my way to eat there again.

What to wear: I was dressed as a chic and expensive 1960s prostitute. Everyone else was in jeans.

What you’ll see: Good looking men with cute dogs who are ‘waiting for their girlfriends’.

The Orange

37-39 Pimlico Rd, London SW1W 8NE

www.theorange.co.uk

Food

The Palomar Restaurant

October 14, 2015

Stephanie

If I was facing the death penalty, I would choose the Challah bread at The Palomar for my last meal. Although, I’d probably be on death row for bludgeoning someone to death for jumping the queue at their Soho location.

The first time I went it was a random invite from a friend and her boyfriend. The clever bunny books restaurants several months in advance for 4 people and then the week of, finds another couple to go with and my fiancé and I won the lottery this time!

The four of us were squashed into a corner table normally reserved for two people and handed menus. I was super intimidated at first because I didn’t know most things on the menu. Thankfully our friends had been there before, and to other restaurants by the same chef group in Jerusalem and assured me the food was incredible. She wasn’t wrong.

My contribution for ordering for the table was the Chicken two ways because it was breaded and fried, and as I said before, that’s pretty much how I judge all food.

It was delicious! The Challah Bread is to literally die for. You can’t go wrong with just about anything you order and take a chance on the chef specials. We did and there were absolutely no regrets!

Reservations are understandably difficult. However, if you go very early, you stand a good chance of getting a seat at the bar. I did that with my vegetarian friend while she was pregnant and the seats were confortable enough for her and she loved the food. It’s also fun to watch the kitchen work in front of you. They have a pretty good sense of humor.

The Palomar

34 Rupert Street

London W1D 6DN

www.thepalomar.co.uk

Stephanie Wahlstrom

Hey! Cute top! Flattery gets you everywhere, right? Seriously, though, I like what you've got going on over there. Anyway, my name is Stephanie and I am a Canadian writer living in London. I like to eat, travel and make people laugh. The Accidental Socialite is the name of my debut novel and this blog where you'll find tales of my mishaps and far too many references to bacon. Enjoy!