Dirty Bones is f&*king glorious. Let me add a small caveat to that statement: I was (conservative estimate) 8 drinks in by the time I got there.
I hope when I die my heaven is dirty bones except that I don’t get morbidly obese from eating it every day for every meal. But if I’m honest I hope heaven is also me giving like, -7 f&*ks about what I look like.
We were there for a private party in the back and my (genius) friend decided to have it 90s themed. My husband beat me to the ordering but started strong with chicken wings and the Dirty Dog. I don’t like to eat meat off bones because it makes me feel like a cave man, but considering how fast they went, I’m sure the wings were delicious. The hot dog… well, it’s going into my top 5. There were crispy shallots and two different kinds of pork. TWO. Crispy bacon, which is the only way to have it, and pulled pork.
We were still hungry so I went big and ordered the Yankee Dog, the Mac Daddy and the Dirty Fries, because you know what? I don’t go half way down a rabbit hole.
The Mac Daddy has mac and cheese on it (enough said) and I almost bit my husband’s finger off for the last bite of the Yankee Dog. Like I said before, this place is f&*king glorious. I gained at least 12 lbs eating here but cool with it because IT WAS DECLICIOUS.
I also had more drinks. This is an actual conversation with the bartender:
Me: 70% of me wants to order an interesting cocktail from you but the other 30% of me is a skinny bitch and wants a vodka soda.
Bartender: I like the 30% of you.
Bringing me food in the state I was in was like feeding a pack of hungry dogs. The staff were really nice and super accommodating. As soon as I lose the weight I put on, I’m going back to start this vicious cycle again.
Dirty Bones (Kensington)
20 Kensington Church Street, London, W8 4EP